Much Ado About Nothing By William Shakespeare Act III: Scene 5

ACT III. Scene 5. Another Room in LEONATO'S House

[Enter LEONATO and DOGBERRY and VERGES.]

LEONATO.
What would you with me, honest neighbour?

DOGBERRY.
Marry, sir, I would have some confidence with you, that decerns
you nearly.

LEONATO.
Brief, I pray you; for you see it is a busy time with me.

DOGBERRY.
Marry, this it is, sir.

VERGES.
Yes, in truth it is, sir.

LEONATO.
What is it, my good friends?

DOGBERRY.
Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the matter: an old man,
sir, and his wits are not so blunt as, God help, I would desire
they were; but, in faith, honest as the skin between his brows.

VERGES.
Yes, I thank God, I am as honest as any man living, that is an
old man and no honester than I.

DOGBERRY.
Comparisons are odorous: palabras, neighbour Verges.

LEONATO.
Neighbours, you are tedious.

DOGBERRY.
It pleases your worship to say so, but we are the poor duke's
officers; but truly, for mine own part, if I were as tedious as
a king, I could find in my heart to bestow it all of your worship.

LEONATO.
All thy tediousness on me! ha?

DOGBERRY.
Yea, an 't were a thousand pound more than 'tis; for I hear as good
exclamation on your worship, as of any man in the city, and though
I be but a poor man, I am glad to hear it.

VERGES.
And so am I.

LEONATO.
I would fain know what you have to say.

VERGES.
Marry, sir, our watch to-night, excepting your worship's presence,
ha' ta'en a couple of as arrant knaves as any in Messina.

DOGBERRY.
A good old man, sir; he will be talking; as they say, 'when the age
is in, the wit is out.' God help us! it is a world to see! Well said,
i' faith, neighbour Verges: well, God's a good man; an two men ride
of a horse, one must ride behind. An honest soul, i' faith, sir; by
my troth he is, as ever broke bread; but God is to be worshipped: all
men are not alike; alas! good neighbour.

LEONATO.
Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you.

DOGBERRY.
Gifts that God gives.

LEONATO.
I must leave you.

DOGBERRY.
One word, sir: our watch, sir, hath indeed comprehended two
aspicious persons, and we would have them this morning examined
before your worship.


LEONATO.
Take their examination yourself, and bring it me: I am now in great
haste, as may appear unto you.

DOGBERRY.
It shall be suffigance.

LEONATO.
Drink some wine ere you go: fare you well.

[Enter a Messenger.]

MESSENGER.
My lord, they stay for you to give your daughter to her husband.

LEONATO.
I'll wait upon them: I am ready.

[Exeunt LEONATO and Messenger.]

DOGBERRY.
Go, good partner, go, get you to Francis Seacoal; bid him bring his
pen and inkhorn to the gaol: we are now to examination these men.

VERGES.
And we must do it wisely.

DOGBERRY.
We will spare for no wit, I warrant you; here's that shall drive some
of them to a non-come: only get the learned writer to set down our
excommunication, and meet me at the gaol.

[Exeunt.]

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