O'Brien demonstrates this sense of disconnectedness and alienation through the pathos of Norman trying to tell his story, which he has a deep need and desire to do, but then becoming quiet again and keeping the story to himself, first with the men working, then with the boys he passes, and finally with the order taker at A&W. Norman's drive around the lake is a metaphor for this cycle of trying to articulate his story; he circles the familiar town where he grew up looking for his place in it, looking for what he should do next with his life, but being unable to discover that answer. Similarly, he needs to tell his story to begin to come to terms with and take meaning from the memories of Vietnam that creep into his thoughts. Norman, then, is searching for meaning. Norman's repetitive drive in circles around the lake recalls the dancing girl that the troop encounters in "Style;" both are acting out a search for meaning.
Before Norman can tell his story or find meaning, he must resolve the conflict between fear and courage that is at the core of his story of Kiowa's death. The elusive Silver Star is a symbol with its meanings in conflict within the context of this chapter: The award is a military recognition of valor, but Norman would have won it for an act that seems somehow incongruous, saving Kiowa from drowning in the muddy field of human excrement. Because of this incongruity, Norman cannot tell the whole story. He imagines that his father, a veteran himself who understands medals as inaccurate measures of heroism ("knowing full well that many brave men do not win medals for their bravery, and that others win medals for doing nothing") might ask him about the Silver Star. In answering his father's inquiry, Norman would first describe in detail the seven medals he had been awarded. Next he would begin to describe the river, though he would omit that they had mistakenly set up camp in the village's area for excrement. Finally he would ask, "You really want to hear this?" and then continue until he remembers the smell, and his ability to tell the story fails. As Norman's narration breaks off, he notices people and activity around the lake, and he starts another turn around the lake. He goes around and around the lake, which also has an offensive and stinking smell, but does not move to it, as he does not get to the shit field in his story as he tells it to his father in his imagination.
