Determined to honor her parents and prevent them from losing face, Lindo spent the next few years working hard — learning how to cook, sew, and clean — because she had promised her parents that she would be a good wife.
Lindo's monologue to her daughter reinforces Tan's theme of the generation gap. To Lindo and to Chinese women of her generation, it was accepted without question that children would sacrifice everything for their parents' wishes. To the Chinese-American children of today's generation, however, promises and sacrifices have little meaning: Lindo's daughter cannot even honor a simple promise to come to dinner. The girl can offer only feeble excuses. When she was a girl, Lindo had no choice. She had to obey.
Very quickly, Lindo discerned that her future husband, Tyan-yu, was arrogant and spoiled and that her future mother-in-law, Huang Taitai, was cruel and detached. When Lindo turned sixteen, Huang Taitai set the date for the upcoming marriage, planning an elaborate celebration. The Japanese invasion, however, kept nearly all the guests away.
So distraught that she wanted to throw herself into the Fen River, Lindo looked into the mirror and suddenly realized that even though Tyan-yu might own her body, he could never possess her soul. That night, the marriage was not consummated. Tyan-yu fell asleep, and Lindo blew out his end of the tradition-old marriage candle, which was lighted at both ends.
