Nicholas convinces John that the town is soon to be visited with a flood like the one that visited Noah in the Bible and that, to survive, he must build and fasten three boat-like tubs to the rafters and store within them provisions. John follows Nicholas’ instructions, and the evening before the predicted flood, all three — John the carpenter; Alison, John’s wife, and Nicholas, Alison’s paramour — climb into the boats. When the carpenter sleeps, Alison and Nicholas quickly descend to Alison’s bed where they spend the night making love.
Later that night, Absalon, discovering the Miller’s absence, goes to Alison’s window. Denied access to her room, he begs for one kiss. Afraid that the bothersome clerk will arouse the neighbors, Alison agrees to kiss him, but instead of her mouth, she extends her rear out the window. The fastidious Absalon “kissed her naked arse, most savorously.” As he leaves, Absalon overhears the young lovers laughing at him.
Cured of his love sickness, Absalon borrows a red-hot poker from the blacksmith, returns to Alison’s window, and tells her he has a golden ring for her: “I’ll give it to you for one more kiss.” But Nicholas, trying to one-better Alison’s treatment of Absalon, opens the window instead and “stuck out his arse … buttocks and all” and farts in Absalon’s face. Absalon recovers quickly and thrusts the red-hot poker up the middle of Nicholas’ arse.
Nicholas shouts, “Water, help, Water, Water,” startling John from his sleep. Thinking that the flood is coming, John cuts the rope that holds his boat suspended and crashes to the floor. The neighbors, hearing all the ruckus, rush in and, when they hear of John’s preparations for a flood, laugh at his lunacy.
