Esther is plagued by the idea of doing the right thing, but she constantly wants to act otherwise. When Jay Cee calls her and tries to advise her and give her some help, however limited, Esther's response is that Jay Cee said terrible things to her. Her guilt about following the right forms even impedes her judgment. And then she has to confess and tell us how she got her chemistry credit in college from poor Mr. Manzi by fraudulent means. Finally, she and Betsy end up vomiting in the back of a taxicab, after the luncheon and the movie. This is certainly a horrible way for a fashion-conscious young girl, guilt-ridden by social manners, to behave.
Yet only two chapters earlier, when she escaped from an almost equally terrible scene in Lenny's apartment, she found her own silence depressing — just as she does now. It is Esther's inability to communicate — even with herself — that leads to these terrible scenes. And when Doreen gets drunk and lies sick outside her door, Esther just leaves her there. She is not even able to help her friend. She is seemingly devoid of human caring. But then, we cannot expect starving people, weak as they are, to be able to summon up human kindness and help others. Often, such people cannot even help themselves.
