The lower classes of Raveloe are gathered at the Rainbow while their betters are attending Mrs. Osgood's birthday dance. The conversation there has begun slowly this evening, with a mild argument between the farrier and the butcher over a cow that the butcher had slaughtered the day before. The landlord settles the dispute by declaring that they are both right and both wrong. However, the ownership of the cow by Mr. Lammeter leads the landlord to ask Mr. Macey to recall when Mr. Lammeter's father first came to Raveloe. Mr. Macey, before beginning the tale, directs some jibes at his assistant, Mr. Tookey. Macey and Ben Winthrop, leader of the church choir, aim some heavy humor at Tookey for his out-of-tune singing. The landlord again decides the point by allowing that everyone is right and everyone wrong. He then directs the conversation back to the subject of Mr. Lammeter's father.
This time, Macey stays on his subject, pausing now and then to admit the customary questions at the usual places. He recalls that the elder Mr. Lammeter came to Raveloe from "a bit north'ard," bringing his sheep with him. He married the sister of Mr. Osgood and settled at the Warrens. Macey, in his capacity as parish clerk, helped to marry them, and he alone noticed that during the ceremony the rector reversed the key phrases, saying, "Wilt thou have this man to thy wedded wife?" and, "Wilt thou have this woman to thy wedded husband?" Macey was worried that this would invalidate the ceremony: he couldn't decide whether the meaning or the form was the important thing. He decided "it isn't the meanin', it's the glue." But when he questioned the rector, the rector informed him that the important thing was the register.
This story is familiar to all the hearers, and they put the correct questions to Macey. The landlord asks about the land where Mr. Lammeter settled, the Warrens. Macey says it once belonged to a London tailor who tried to make his son a country gentlemen there. After the boy died, the father died raving and left all his property to a London charity. His ghost is said to haunt the stables yet.
Mr. Dowlas, the farrier, has only scorn for ghosts, but several others pity his lack of comprehension. The landlord compromises with the argument that the ability to see ghosts is like a nose for smelling cheese: some have it and some don't.
At this moment, Silas is seen standing within the room, and even the farrier is startled by the feeling that a ghost has come among them. At last the landlord asks Silas what his business is. Silas exclaims that he has been robbed. Seeing Jem Rodney there, he demands his money back. Rodney denies taking it. At last Silas is made to sit down and tell his story. In the end, he apologizes to Jem for accusing him.
Silas is so distraught that there is immediate sympathy for him, and all suspicion vanishes. The farrier proposes that "two of the sensiblest o' the company" should go for the constable, who is ill in bed, and have one appointed as a deputy. The farrier clearly expects to be deputized himself. However, Mr. Macey recalls that his father told him that no doctor could be a constable, and even a cow doctor is a doctor. The farrier doesn't wish to decline the title of doctor, but argues that the law means that a doctor doesn't have to serve if he wishes not to. Nevertheless, he is driven by Macey's "merciless reasoning" to deny that he wants to be the constable. The landlord settles the dispute by persuading the farrier to go as the second man.
